Edward’s Diary Entry 43 – Virtue 22: Forgiveness (Kshama)

Isn’t it funny how the crown in the jewel of the Earth, the cream of the crop, the so-called highest being in the evolutionary chain… is such a disgrace? And he has to learn from lowly beings such as ants, birds and dogs. Well, pardon my French, but the comparison is unfair. Why should there be anything “higher” or “lower”? There are just differences in brain structure and possibly potential. But there is no doubt that man is often a disgrace. Why, we can bear a grudge for years, no, decades, without getting over it. I personally know family members who don’t talk to other family members, once bosom-buddies who have bickered and fallen out over something stupid (and it wasn’t Sinatra’s something stupid like “I love you”!), and so many examples of lovers who have turned 180º and now hate each other. Not to mention identification or obsession with nation-states or religious ideas, producing rejection, anger, hatred, violence and death. Oh yes, we can get angry over anything: the “big” things like what religion or nation you belong to; or the “little” things like a toothpick, thumbtack, or a fly. So Virtue 22 was prescribed for the benefit of our chaotic untrained minds which tend to do these silly, childish and peevish things. It is called forgiveness, and Cesar Millán the Dog Whisperer in a talk with Eckhart Tolle explained why a dog is such a noble being. With every new moment, dogs always start again from "zero", having forgiven and forgotten completely anything that happened just before. You say a harsh word to a dog and it cringes, and then you say “walkies” and it’s over; he’s ready to go. You are angry and mistreat him; you realise your foolishness and repent, and the next moment he’s all over you. I know a dog who walks around and picks out the chief dog-hater (or at least the one who “doesn’t like dogs” the most) in a group of humans and goes for him, trying to win him over, striving to make that human see the foolishness of his ways, cajoling him into liking him! Smart dog – probably a gift from heaven. So why do we superior beings, supposed lords of the universe, always start by remembering the last “bad” action performed by another unto us? Knowingly, the savants of old said we need to practise “Kshama”, “forgiveness” to solve this. It’s the only solution for unwise, yet-to-be-civilised man. To forgive, or “give up desire or power to punish", is a transcendental action in the Now, because to “forgive” is in the present, and the action in the past that seems to us to be wrong – and this is the subject of eternal debate – could not have occurred otherwise. It is done; it cannot be changed in the past, so “forgiving” the past – amongst friends, parents, siblings, relatives, or anyone – is an action that absolves the past, washes it clean and changes the present for both the forgiver and the forgiven. It is a liquidator of erroneous ideas. It shows generosity, compassion and other virtues. It is the mark of the wise being. Like the dog, who was taught to be a dog by man, remember. So whenever something that seems “bad” happens to you and you think someone is to blame, just act like a dog and forget it, or if you’re cultured, remit and repeat this: “ὁ δὲ Ἰησοῦς ἔλεγεν Πάτερ, ἄφες αὐτοῖς· οὐ γὰρ οἴδασιν τί ποιοῦσιν.” You know the saying about forgiveness, so be divine...