Edward’s Diary Entry 94: The Inner “I” unveiled…

Today we journey upwards from the connecting stroke of the outward and inner strokes (at 2a), but here too, great care must be taken! The pen nib once again turns as it goes upward (from 2a to 2b), making a thin connecting line to the upper portion of the “inner I”. See how the line twists and becomes thinner as we go upwards. How unstable is the mind at this point, and its decision to approach this inner and upper world is ever fraught with difficulty, always seeming to turn back and seek the apparent substantiality of the thick lower line of our selves, connecting back to the “world outside”, which, the wise say, is only a dream world anyway, a mere creation of the mind, which interprets the outside world and hides its true nature in sense objects.

But supposing we are strong-minded enough to glimpse the heights above, then we see that this inner world as symbolised by the backward facing “I” of this Gothic marvel, tells us to seek refuge in its tripartite body: the top curve depicting the spirit (2c to 2d), whence comes all our life force to live, work and struggle; the middle part symbolising the soul (2a to 2b), where we pray to live and work and struggle; and the bottom curve facing downwards to the Earth, to our bodies (2a up to 1a), where we simply “think and imagine” that we live and work and struggle…

This letter has much more to it, so let’s look at its parts more closely. We have to face backwards or inwards to see them. In this Medieval creation, we can see that the outward facing “I” has actually turned its back on the soul-spirit entity and looks outward to the world only. Do we need tome upon tome of writings on questions of the soul, the mind, of higher worlds, of psychology, of philosophy, to see what has happened to us? In one beautifully conceived letter, our Medieval geniuses have given us a symbol to see for ourselves what we are like.

At any point where the pen should fail due to too little ink, we might be “disconnected” from the hidden spiritual parts of man. But this is our “normal” civilised state. Yet it would seem to be a fictitious state, because if the line were completely disconnected, we would simply die and the parts of “us” would go their separate ways. So we should consider that there is always this connection, however slight, however faint. Without it, there could be no life. But when we only look outwards, facing right as our right-hand letter-part does, we ascribe this life to ourselves and bow before the world outside and put our outward “I” upon the pedestal of egoism and believe that we are whole and one, when we are not. And the Wise also say that this is illusion, a dream world, and in fact, when we sleep – in deep, dreamless sleep – we are always in connection with our higher selves, where we rest from the “dream-life” of the world we call normal “consciousness”. And then, when we “come back” into our little egos and dream, and remember our dreams, we are actually spying on our own ceaseless thoughts and sensations and experiencing them as if they were real, and… wasting energy that has not been used productively throughout the day, as some say. Only when a dream is produced from some kind of “higher world” (inner world) as a message or portent or inspiration upon waking can it be considered to be valid and not just a waste of energy in the ebb and flow of the ceaseless mind.

A few reminders about the “inner man”:

Christ:                   “The Kingdom of Heaven is within you.”

Mohammed:          “He who knows his own self, knows God.”

Native American:  “At the center of the universe dwells Wakan-Tanka, and this center is really everywhere, it is within each of us.”

Zen Buddhism:      “A special transmission outside the scriptures; No dependence on words and letters; Direct pointing to the mind or heart of man; Seeing into one's nature and attaining Buddhahood.”

Socrates:               “Know thyself.”